What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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