I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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