I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
