can we get nightvision for the apartment?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
