we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
