who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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