Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
You are a booty call, not a friend.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
