i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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