I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
