Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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