Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
