There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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