You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
What a dumb baby whore.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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