living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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