what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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