I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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