..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize