So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
