Soap is not a condiment
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
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