just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
My vagina is officially offended.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
