dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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