the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
