I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
