i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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