Jerry, you need to find god
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Randomize
