you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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