Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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