His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize