office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Who did Billy Mays play for?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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