Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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