what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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