So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Is it because I queefed?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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