watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
