So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
