Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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