I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
