Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
