You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
