ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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