i just google imaged poop.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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