I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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