i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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