Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize
