Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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