I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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