Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
