oh god the rape fog is back!
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
