Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
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