Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Randomize
