your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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